Some people are fans of Bonchan. But many other people are NOT fans of Bonchan. This article is for those in the latter group. And yes, I did completely steal this idea from Drew Magary. So sue me.
Your player
RB | Bonchan, professional hold-back specialist:
BOY HOWDY does that guy like to block.
Personal history
As a Sagat loyalist in SFIV, Bonchan built a sterling legacy for himself. With wins at big-time tournaments such as Topanga League 3 the Red Bull Kumite, and with a second-place finish at Evo in 2014, Bonchan positioned himself as a hero to the community. Even Punk, the most snot-nosed whippersnapper who ever snappered a whipper, fell under Bonchan's sway:
In a world of counterpickers and tier-jumping Sanford Kelly types, Bonchan stood out as a character specialist who had the talent to back it up.
Also, from the sound of things, it kinda seems like Bonchan once roughed a guy up over a game of mahjong:
Make of that what you will.
CPT season recap
Bonchan is one of the few players to have won at least three consecutive CPT tournaments this year, not to mention the only top player who still gives a shit about Nash. But what else would we expect? After all, this is BONCHAN we're talking about, the loyalest loyalist this side of a joystick. All hail Bonchan, mid-tier hero!
Oh, no wait, I lied. Because the world is a giant shit sandwich and god is dead, Bonchan got his wins and then dropped Nash like a bad habit:
But did he beat Mike Ross?
Absofuckinglutely:
Too bad we'll NEVER SEE THOSE CHARACTERS EVER AGAIN because they're too busy releasing Egyptian catgirls and hydrocephalic auto mechanics. Thanks a lot, Capcom.
Why he's getting bodied at Capcom Cup
Because the Street Fighter gods HATE Bonchan. They HAAAAAAATE him. Remember that one year he made grand finals in SFIV with Sagat? Remember how his opponent played Rose, the most perfect anti-Sagat character imaginable? He couldn't win in the fireball game because Rose got more meter per projectile and had TWO anti-fireball specials. He couldn't win in the midrange because Rose's movement was way faster and she had that stupid hopkick. And he couldn't win in the close range because her buttons were better and faster. Rose even had an anti-fireball ultra. Basically, trying to use Sagat to beat Rose is like trying to fight a dog by throwing treats at it: all that's gonna happen is that the dog is gonna eat all those treats and then probably try to hump your leg.
And that, friends, was the HAPPY part of Bonchan's career. When Street Fighter V dropped without Sagat, Bonchan lost his main and tried to switch to Ryu. When they nerfed the living fuck out of Ryu in season 2, Bonchan switched to Nash, who - guess what! - HAD ALSO BEEN NERFED. (Look out, Karin players - you're next!) It's like the Capcom is purposefully trying to make Bonchan quit the game.
So, yeah, given all of that, I'm not super-optimistic about his chances.
"But wait," you say
Bonchan is great! He's consistent and he's a hard worker and, let's be honest, his hair-dye game is on point. If you think that those qualities are good enough to land him a championship, tell me so in the comments.
Your player
RB | Bonchan, professional hold-back specialist:
BOY HOWDY does that guy like to block.
Personal history
As a Sagat loyalist in SFIV, Bonchan built a sterling legacy for himself. With wins at big-time tournaments such as Topanga League 3 the Red Bull Kumite, and with a second-place finish at Evo in 2014, Bonchan positioned himself as a hero to the community. Even Punk, the most snot-nosed whippersnapper who ever snappered a whipper, fell under Bonchan's sway:
In a world of counterpickers and tier-jumping Sanford Kelly types, Bonchan stood out as a character specialist who had the talent to back it up.
Also, from the sound of things, it kinda seems like Bonchan once roughed a guy up over a game of mahjong:
Make of that what you will.
CPT season recap
Bonchan is one of the few players to have won at least three consecutive CPT tournaments this year, not to mention the only top player who still gives a shit about Nash. But what else would we expect? After all, this is BONCHAN we're talking about, the loyalest loyalist this side of a joystick. All hail Bonchan, mid-tier hero!
Oh, no wait, I lied. Because the world is a giant shit sandwich and god is dead, Bonchan got his wins and then dropped Nash like a bad habit:
"If you can say 'I'll win every time using him', then that's fine, but I can't rely on that when it comes to Nash."Oh, well, is THAT all. He just wants to play a character who wins EVERY TIME. Seems like a reasonable request.
But did he beat Mike Ross?
Absofuckinglutely:
Too bad we'll NEVER SEE THOSE CHARACTERS EVER AGAIN because they're too busy releasing Egyptian catgirls and hydrocephalic auto mechanics. Thanks a lot, Capcom.
Why he's getting bodied at Capcom Cup
Because the Street Fighter gods HATE Bonchan. They HAAAAAAATE him. Remember that one year he made grand finals in SFIV with Sagat? Remember how his opponent played Rose, the most perfect anti-Sagat character imaginable? He couldn't win in the fireball game because Rose got more meter per projectile and had TWO anti-fireball specials. He couldn't win in the midrange because Rose's movement was way faster and she had that stupid hopkick. And he couldn't win in the close range because her buttons were better and faster. Rose even had an anti-fireball ultra. Basically, trying to use Sagat to beat Rose is like trying to fight a dog by throwing treats at it: all that's gonna happen is that the dog is gonna eat all those treats and then probably try to hump your leg.
And that, friends, was the HAPPY part of Bonchan's career. When Street Fighter V dropped without Sagat, Bonchan lost his main and tried to switch to Ryu. When they nerfed the living fuck out of Ryu in season 2, Bonchan switched to Nash, who - guess what! - HAD ALSO BEEN NERFED. (Look out, Karin players - you're next!) It's like the Capcom is purposefully trying to make Bonchan quit the game.
So, yeah, given all of that, I'm not super-optimistic about his chances.
"But wait," you say
Bonchan is great! He's consistent and he's a hard worker and, let's be honest, his hair-dye game is on point. If you think that those qualities are good enough to land him a championship, tell me so in the comments.
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